One of my favorite times of the day is dinner time. It has nothing to do with the food, especially when I am the cook, and it has everything to do with my usual dining companions-my two daughters. Even during the most hectic of times, sitting down together at the kitchen table for dinner is more than a tradition, it is sacred family time that I fiercely protect. The reason I guard it so closely is that it is during these times that we share the occurrences of our respective days, dream aloud, laugh hysterically, and just enjoy being in one another’s presence, and I refuse to let anything interfere with that if at all possible.
Some evenings, we cover a variety of topics, and I find myself inspired by something that is shared among the three of us. Tonight, the subject of what makes someone a good parent came up, and what follows are my daughters’ top five suggestions that parents and other adults can do every day to be kind to a child:
1. Tell them that you love them.
Do not assume that a child, or anyone else for that matter, knows that you love them. Actions may speak louder than words, but those three words are so important to say and to hear. So, say it often, and then, show them that you love them in big and small ways.
2. Don’t get mad at them for silly stuff.
Patience may not be a virtue, but for a parent or anyone who cares for a child, it is crucial. Too often, we expect children to be more mature and advanced than they are and then get frustrated with them for not performing skills or thinking at a much higher level than is age appropriate. Sometimes, we allow a child’s simple mistake to be the trigger for a flood of angry words and/or gestures, because we think that it will not impact child, but it can. Children are resilient, but they are not immune to harsh words and actions of adults. Choose your battles wisely, and when you engage in a battle, be careful what words and actions you employ as weapons. Children are not here to make our lives or jobs easier; they are here to learn and grow. Making mistakes is part of that learning process. So, losing your temper says more about you than it does about them. Remember that.
3. Don’t put pressure on them.
We all want to see a child thrive and succeed, but at what cost?! Sometimes, a child performs up to the best of their abilities, yet it still is not enough to make the team, gain entrance into a coveted school, win a contest, etc. Other times, what you want for them is not what they want for themselves. Learn the difference between encouraging and pressuring, and work on being as objective and honest as you possibly can about your child’s capabilities, talents, and interests. Pressure may motivate some people, but it also may make a child crumble under the weight of it.
4. Let them know you’re there for them.
Even when they feign disinterest in you or act like they don’t need you, children need to know that you are in their corner. Keep asking them questions. Invite them to chat with you or engage in an activity or project with you. Be a visible and positive presence in their life.
5. Listen to them.
Put your cell phone down. Unplug your earphones. Turn off the TV. Power down your laptop. Make eye contact when they speak to you. Be attentive and present. Active listening sadly has become a lost art in today’ technological world, but it is not too late to listen to children, starting right now.
This is definitely food for thought. Just one thing each day . . .
Just wanted you to know that I created the image at the top of your page. I’m glad you like it and happy to share it. But if you could put my page (fb/humanrightsforhumanchildren) as the photo credit, I would really appreciate it. Thank you.
I apologize, as I thought that your page was visible on the image and will set about to list it under the Photo Credit section, as well. Thanks for the valuable work that you do and for your support!
No problem! I hope I didn’t sound grumpy about it. I just figured it was nice to give credit where credit is due, especially since Pinterest probably isn’t really ever a legitimate credit source because everything there is taken from someplace else. Anyway, thank you for adding the credit, and thank you for the good work you do!
On Sat, Dec 27, 2014 at 2:45 PM, Kindness Blog wrote:
> kristijojedlicki commented: “I apologize, as I thought that your page > was visible on the image and will set about to list it under the Photo > Credit section, as well. Thanks for the valuable work that you do and for > your support!”
I didn’t mind at all and am glad that you said something. I definitely will pay more attention to those details from now on, as I really didn’t think about it. Good to know!
Thank you so much for such lovely words! My daughters teach me so much every single day, and I loved their suggestions and plan to do my best to take their advice and put it to good use.
Reblogged this on Think Before You Act and commented:
This is perfect in my opinion. It is essential to teach the younger generations about kindness. If we later generations are all taught how to love each other fully, they will not have to deal with many of the problems we face today. The world we live in today is filled with many cruel people. However, that is not to say that there are no loving people left. It is up to those who are kind to infect the world with kindness.
Thank you so very much for sharing your wonderful insights and for reblogging this post! Children are our greatest assets and teachers, and all adults, parents and non-parents alike, need to be mindful of the examples that we set. If we can teach them to be kind and compassionate, we will have done a wonderful thing and left this world in a much better place indeed. Thanks for spreading kindness!
Thanks so much; I am grateful for your kind words! I agree that giving a child unconditional love and acceptance are far more valuable gifts than any material item.
I so love my children and want them to have spiritual and emotional and physical strength. I love encouraging them even though they are both young adults. if you can’t love your own then where will they find it? I do enjoy blessing them materially too but they know that they are loved.
I like that quote a lot in the feature image. Nice find!
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Thanks, as it is a favorite quote of mine, as well!
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Just wanted you to know that I created the image at the top of your page. I’m glad you like it and happy to share it. But if you could put my page (fb/humanrightsforhumanchildren) as the photo credit, I would really appreciate it. Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I apologize, as I thought that your page was visible on the image and will set about to list it under the Photo Credit section, as well. Thanks for the valuable work that you do and for your support!
LikeLike
No problem! I hope I didn’t sound grumpy about it. I just figured it was nice to give credit where credit is due, especially since Pinterest probably isn’t really ever a legitimate credit source because everything there is taken from someplace else. Anyway, thank you for adding the credit, and thank you for the good work you do!
On Sat, Dec 27, 2014 at 2:45 PM, Kindness Blog wrote:
> kristijojedlicki commented: “I apologize, as I thought that your page > was visible on the image and will set about to list it under the Photo > Credit section, as well. Thanks for the valuable work that you do and for > your support!”
LikeLiked by 1 person
I didn’t mind at all and am glad that you said something. I definitely will pay more attention to those details from now on, as I really didn’t think about it. Good to know!
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What a beautiful post and such good advice!
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Thank you so much for such lovely words! My daughters teach me so much every single day, and I loved their suggestions and plan to do my best to take their advice and put it to good use.
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Reblogged this on That's Another Story.
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Just finished reading the whole post. It was nicely written and I agree completely to it’s truth. Great examples for all to follow.
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I really do appreciate you taking the time to both read the post and to share your feedback. It meant a lot to share my daughters’ wise words here.
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Reblogged this on Listen Through My Heart.
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I so appreciate you reblogging this!
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It is a message to be shared!
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That really means a lot to me!
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Reblogged this on Raidah The Writer .
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Heartfelt thanks for reblogging this post!
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Short and sweet . . . and excellent advice
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Thank you so much, as I appreciate your kind feedback!
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Reblogged this on Mirroring the World and commented:
the Right Child-Rearing Practices…
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Many thanks for sharing this!
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no problem, because we need MORE of these positive examples these days.
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I definitely agree, and I thank you!
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Great quote and great advice. Thanks, BTG
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You are more than welcome, and thank you very much for your continued support and kindness!
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Reblogged this on MrMilitantNegro™.
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Many, many thanks for thinking enough of this to reblog it!
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My pleasure to reblog this. Thank you for sharing it. Enjoy your week.
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Thank you for this x
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You are so welcome, and I am really glad that you liked it!
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🙂
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Reblogged this on Think Before You Act and commented:
This is perfect in my opinion. It is essential to teach the younger generations about kindness. If we later generations are all taught how to love each other fully, they will not have to deal with many of the problems we face today. The world we live in today is filled with many cruel people. However, that is not to say that there are no loving people left. It is up to those who are kind to infect the world with kindness.
LikeLike
Thank you so very much for sharing your wonderful insights and for reblogging this post! Children are our greatest assets and teachers, and all adults, parents and non-parents alike, need to be mindful of the examples that we set. If we can teach them to be kind and compassionate, we will have done a wonderful thing and left this world in a much better place indeed. Thanks for spreading kindness!
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So many children need to be assured tatt they are loved and treasured. Even more than getting material things. Very nice article!
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Thanks so much; I am grateful for your kind words! I agree that giving a child unconditional love and acceptance are far more valuable gifts than any material item.
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I so love my children and want them to have spiritual and emotional and physical strength. I love encouraging them even though they are both young adults. if you can’t love your own then where will they find it? I do enjoy blessing them materially too but they know that they are loved.
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That is simply beautiful and so well said. I want the same things for my two daughters, and I am proud of their compassionate and kind hearts.
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Reblogged this on sohailmuhammad43 and commented:
Try it…
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Thanks so very much for reblogging this!!!
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