3 Simple Steps to Be Kinder to Yourself
by Tunisia Jolyn
Ever had a friend who was going through a tough time and called you for advice? After listening attentively to the problem, you try everything possible to help your friend solve it or at the very least, cope with it?
What happens to your inner therapist when you go through a tough time? Why do you not offer a listening ear to your own issues? Why do not try everything possible to help solve your own problem or at the very least, cope with it?
Why is it easier for you to be kind when someone else is in pain than when you are in pain?
Do you forget to be a friend to yourself? Are you really your own worst enemy? How can you mend this relationship with yourself?
Well, maybe these three simple steps can help solve your dilemma and be kinder to yourself:
1) Take a moment each day to listen to your own problem(s).
This does not mean have a mini pity party every single day. This does mean, however, you listen very closely to your core issues with tender loving care. You do not judge anything that comes to mind about your problem. You simply listen to your own thoughts. In order to correct or to make peace with any given situation, one must first admit that there is an issue; therefore, giving yourself an opportunity each day to mentally check out your status, can create a healthy and open relationship with yourself. Some days, you may even realize that there are no problems which means you can happily jump right to number three if that’s the case.
2) Talk to yourself as if you were talking to your own best friend.
Once you have listened carefully to your own concerns of the day then you can begin the healing process by offering advice to yourself as you would with any one of your closest friends. You can also tell yourself the truth when you need to say it and offer it with love. It would be even better if you document your advice in a journal so that you can re-read your guidance when you forget what the action steps were to fix your problem.
3) Follow up with a “How are you?” and hear your words and more importantly, listen to your tone.
You know how a friend may say “I’m fine” when you ask that question but you know deep down your friend is not fine at all? The nuance of your words is very essential when you follow up on yourself so please call yourself out if you are lying on how you truly feel and congratulate yourself when you are genuinely feeling better because this means you are making significant progress on your emotional health and that is always a means for a fun private party.
Now, your problem and your pain will probably not magically disappear after doing this for one day but if you do these three steps each day or every other day, you should see a great change in your relationship with yourself because you will be taking kind advice from the one person that knows you best—you.
Creator of A Little Positivity and A Little Expression
Creative Commons Attribution License: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/